Yiddish: He couldn't attach a tail to a cat.

He's totally incompetent, good for nothing.  SOURCE: Stutchkoff, Der Oytser fun der Yidisher Shprakh.  Israel Furman explains in Yidishe Shprikhverter un Rednsartn that the reference is to the children's game of pinning a paper tail to a picture of a cat, similar to “pin the tail on the donkey.”

ער קען ניט אַ קאַץ דעם עק פֿאַרבינדן.

Er ken nit a kats dem ek farbindn.

He couldn't attach a tail to a cat.